whilst I was on my way out of the house.
I didn't panic.
My aunt did. She freaked out. Her scream rang out for miles and miles.
I did not see what the fuss was about; it wasn't like I was not the
first one to give birth. But there she was rolling on the floor and
wailing like a banshee.
Odd, birth is such a beautiful thing.
When mama came running she was clutching her purse in one hand and her
holding her phone to her ear,
"Chiiko!" ("What's happening?") I remember shrugging nonchalantly and
turning to pack my nappy bag,
"Nothing hey, auntie is crying because my water just broke,"
"Oh God, are you alright?" she asked rushing to my side.
"I'm fine mama, it's just I can't find any baby clothes, I totally
forgot to buy, all I have is one of the old nappies you used to use
and a bib, I doubt the baby will be needing that anytime soon but let
me just pack it in case,"
Aunt Gladys was now writhing noiselessly on the floor, occasionally
letting out a ragged sigh.
Her theatrics were annoying.
"Mama, tell her to get out, go call a taxi or something to take me to
"Gladys get up come on, we need to get V to the hospital,"
Mama yanked her off the floor and held her up as she walked them both
out the door. I could feel the baby trying to make its way out now. It
did not hurt though, I just felt like I needed to use the toilet,
through the wrong hole.
"Hang in there," I mumbled running a hand over my belly.
I heard the far away rumble of traffic, drawing closer until I
realised that I was standing on a footpath in the city.
The baby was starting to crown and I wondered vaguely where mama had
gone off to. She should have only been a minute, but it seemed like
she had been gone for ages.
A chair appeared in front of me and I sat down waiting for her. But
the baby was coming and I couldn't hold it off any longer. So, lying
back I reached between my legs let out a little grunt and gripping the
baby by its head I pulled the it out of the safe confines of my womb.
It did not make a sound, neither did it move. Instead it remained
rigid in my palm, ramrod straight and cold as ice. I pulled at the
umbilical cord, and it came right off.
Disconnected I laid the baby on the bench and watched it for a while,
I felt nothing for it. No pulling of heartstrings, no sense of loss,
only a clinical detachment.
It opened its eye's then, mewled for a just a split second and let out
an ear bleeding shriek. Piercing the brittle walls around my heart.
For the first time in my life, I felt love. Total love for another
human being. I was humbled.
In case you are wondering what sort of madness that is, I will tell
you. That was a dream I had last night. Scared me so much I spent the
whole day pressing my stomach just to make sure was not pregnant. I
circled a pharmacy twice, trying to decide whether or not to go in and
buy a pregnancy test kit. If you have an inkling as to what it may or
may NOT mean, do tell ;)