Scribbles

Matt, I am not sure if he likes being called that though, agreed to blog for me, and after weeks of stalking and envying his blog , I am as pleased as punch! Here goes.... ------------------------------------------ A Facebook friend wrote a status update with the opening lines of the theme song to a very popular 90s sitcom, but without naming the show. It was an invitation for a know-it-all like me to offer a guess; and, like a person easily baited by chances to show off game show trivia without actually earning a dime for being right, I dived in head-first. But it proved to be like a head-first dive into the shallow end of the pool, or the part of a lake that's a little bit too close to the pier. It was much more than a guess; it was a confident assertion. Apparently, "Everywhere You Look" was the theme song for Full House, and not Family Matters. I KNEW THAT . To be fair (and regain some ego points), I hardly watched Full House. To me...

Back in 2005 when I was as chubby cheeked, fat infused, tender kneed, tender eyed, braid-haired, bra-less, knee-skirted, sometime-pant-wearing, boy-hungry, age-unripened, dream-dreaming, rafter- shoed, eyes-unopened girl of 18. I was single and may or may not have desired to have a boyfriend. I do not remember. What I do know is that it is the last year I was ever single.  I never received a single letter, nor did my phone ring because I did not have one. The only one I had ever had, had been stolen. It was stolen on a Monday, I know this because I had spent the weekend bugging my daddy for his phone- a Nokia 7210, and I had Nokia 5100. By Monday I had worn him out. He handed it to me gruffly and I switched the sim cards. “I put money in your account, so if you want any,” he didn’t finish off.  Every time he did something nice and fatherly he scowled and fidgeted, affection was easier for him when he was drunk then he would cheerfully summon us, ...

                   I spent the weekend reading  Shimmer Chinodya's Harvest of Thorns , and had a blast at it. Lord knows why I never read it before, because I have had it in my Library for a while. $0D Here's an excerpt where the hero is declaring his love for the umpteenth time, and still he gets no response from his beloved Shamiso. I am hereby sent you a camera fotopicture taken me by my best friend Jeshua so that you can remind and thinking of me all times. Perhaps you have forgetting me and I’m sending this fotopicture for you to put on top your pillow so you can dream about me when your eyes falling sleepy. I still love you over than and will not stop scripting until the world stops and all the enjels come and God ‘says’ everybody to Heaven or to Hell but I’m cokesure a butifull girl like you is going to HEAVEN stret away. S’true  God, Shamiso I love you more each day. I will go on scripting even I ...

 If you cannot see this I am terribly sorry, I am not a techno geek and drawing that took all the skills I posses, don't give me that squint eyed judgy look. Any how If ever I make the mistake of not using the bathroom before I leave home, this is what I will be forced to use. That lovely  lady stands sentinel at the door and asks for 50c every time some hapless pedestrian wonders into her domain. She is a council worker; her job is to keep the loo clean, she does not. The one time I tried to use the toilet the very sight of it froze my pee, it wouldn’t come out. There was filth everywhere!  I liken her to a giant troll that lives under a filthy bridge, or an ogre that revels in its own filth. -------------------- In other news... ...A picture is worth a thousand words. This happened yesterday.

What To Do When Life Gets Complicated? - The Launchpad : " Joy is a fruit of the Spirit" 'via Blog this'

When I was a child I never realised how much of a drama queen my mum was. I realise now exactly how much. I remember this day through a daze of other memories, but I am pretty sure that if I type fast enough the movement of my fingers will hypnotise me enough for me to draw fourth this oh-so-almost-painful-memory,   that is such a lie. I had done something trivial which would embarrass you and me both if I took the liberty to give the full details of this ill fated day. What I do remember is that it involved L and me. Although, how a 12 year old could have been in cohorts with a 6 year old is beyond me, but we had been the Dynamic Duo.  Ok bad script, scratch that. I had done something i know but um being one for theatre of sorts, managed to drag L in it. I blame it on her ability to keep all my faults in a little box somewhere at the back of her brain and then open that little box. Kinda like your mum, and yours and yours and yours. What i ...

Oh joy, never mind my earlier post . I got my good buddy Tariro, over at October Madness to do the writing thing for me. Love her post like I did. --------------------------------   I went to a youth gathering some time back. Albeit I was feeling a bit uneasy  because the only person I was sure I would know was my cousin. But much to my pleasure when I arrived I met a girl I had learnt with in High school, we will call her X. X was always the pretty one; long legged and pretty. I was really glad to see X because now I knew more people than just the one person I had arrived with (purely selfish reason). We get to the part where someone needs to read the Bible (World best seller, did you know?) One gentleman decides that X should read to the group. My “past teen years brain” tells me he was just trying to get her attention, I did mention that she was pretty, right. Guy: X should do the reading X: ahh guys ...

If you follow this blog then you will know that every week, I find some person from the blogging Internets and ask them to take the burden of posting off my shoulder for Wednesday. Up till now I had been doing quite a good job of suckering someone into doing that for me. Not so this week, I asked my buddy Dodger and he agreed 2 weeks ago, things seemed to be going well between us, till I told him not to post politics or anything serious. You see I get bored easily and I figured if I wanted a discussion on politics I would hop over to The Economist website, which I do on occasion. To this he said I was infringing his right to... express himself and what not, and how I was no different from what ZANU does to every independent media in the country, oh well *shrugs* I suppose I should have let him go on about the Prime Minister's $36000 bride. Anyway bottom line, he went A.W.O.L

I am completely and utterly in love with myself. I do not know when I fell in love, but I am pretty sure it wasn’t the day I discovered that I had a smoking hot body that I could feed anything and it would never think to betray me by piling on the kilos, neither was it the time I discovered that my I’m was higher in the languages which put me in a better position to air out my opinion than a lot of other douches. Yes douches, I discovered a long time ago that the average human wasn’t worth listening to because generally they spoke about nothing of worth. Whilst I on the other hand figured I had the encyclopaedic brain of Pluto, Napoleon and that Greek Medicine Guy, remind me again to Google him. See what I did there? No? Never mind. I am still to pinpoint the exact moment that I fell wholly and utterly in love with myself. Not in the masturbatory way that Chelsea did do with her 8 year old self, or do I like the god of self love (Johnny Bravo) spend hours preening mysel...

  Please enterness, and welcome to my blog. I found a couple of gems on how to become, better in society. Please read carefully and take a bit of Chinese wisdom.     Something has to be done about global warning, and as always the Chinese seem to have found at least a solution or three or four, this is my favourite.

"And that's how I was born, not what you tell me." Like any self-respecting mother-and-daughter combo, my mother and I decide to have the talk with the twelve year old. Not about the birds and the bees mind. She seemed to know enough of that, the other day she had come into my room sat on my little bed in the corner, and proceeded to tell me how much more dangerous some STDs were than others.  Chlamydia it seems, does not exhibit any symptoms in the female of our species, and in her book gonorrhoea was by far the most unforgiving and icky. I sat there in front of my mirror hand suspended not sure whether to proceed with my make up or tell her to shut up because, good girls did not talk that way. For the first time in my life I wished we were living on some slave estate in the 1800s and I could not so gently chide her but hitting her mouth and threatening to tell mama, or more ominously, the master. Instead I took a deep breath, rem...

My mother was pretty peeved the other day when the two Ns walked into the house after dark. And instead of launching an attack on the both of them, she decided to allot times to each in order for them to fully state and defend their case, potentially they would each get a hiding. What followed went exactly like this, and it was said in the vernacular. But for the sake of you Russians and Americans I have taken the liberty of translating it. The scene was her bed where she lay like a Modern day Marilyn Monroe minus the cigarette holder and sexy pout. Instead she had a phone in her hand and was staring at her reflection trying to decide whether or not she should die her hair, I am not one for other peoples vanity and was shaking my head quite vehemently. She looked at her reflection one more time and gazed past me to look outside; I was sitting by the window. “Where are those kids?” “Still out in the street somewhere I guess, the sun has barely gone down.” ...

 I am such a lucky bird, (that beautiful bird of paradise yes), every week I have such awesome bloggers doing their thing for me. So this week Liesl over at   Pretty.Random.Things   is in this week’s blog list. So without further wha-wha from me, here she is, enjoy her post as much as I did.

  I get severe headaches, migraines. So bad that I need to take something for it cause if I don’t I have visions of my brain cracking open and my brain spilling out. So to avoid this I take a not so powerful narcotic… which I run the risk of becoming addicted to I take half the prescribed dosage. This medication is a combination of a narcotic (hydrocodone) and a non-narcotic (acetaminophen) used to relieve moderate to severe pain. Hydrocodone works by binding to opioid receptors in the brain and spinal cord, and acetaminophen decreases the formation of prostaglandins, therefore relieving pain. This medication may also be used to suppress a cough. I bet you didn’t know that I knew such big words huh, I don’t. They make no sense to me, but they sound nice and ominous hey? I digress. I was pleased as punch to have discovered Propain, till I read the list of side effects. ·          it may cause serious (possibly fatal) ...