Let's Take A Little Quiz Shall We...

Please tick appropriate answers.

1.       Hi! How are you?

o   I can’t find my FEET

o   I like tomatoes

o   Good! You?

o   STALKER

Feel free to tick whichever is more appropriate, and befits a person of my station. Although I do wonder what station that may be. Today’s post is all about quizzes, random I-know-the-answer-and-you-don’t questions. LET’S GO!

2.       What number do you mean when you say a few?

No seriously what number, 2,100, 0 how many is a few?

3.       Many people feel that fat women have a harder time than fat men. Do you agree that fat women have a harder time than fat men? Do you feel that society treats fat people differently depending on gender.(found on www.quizrocket.com)

o   as a woman, I suffer special pressure to stay skinny and not get fat

o   As a man, I worry less about getting fat than women do.

o   I am a man

o   I am a woman

I asked my mum this question and she ticked I am a woman. See like most African women she is not satisfied unless her weight I teetering towards 80kilos, which I always try to remind her is really not very healthy. But she told me she wouldn’t quit until she was way ahead of our neighbour Mai Tito. Although I do think her body is letting her down. She hasn’t gained an ounce for almost a year now.

I blame the wholly organic food she eats.

4.       What kind of a dozen is 13?

o   Half dozen

o   Baker’s dozen

o   Dozen and one

Place curse here, something clever and original because you got this one wrong.

 Anne Robinson asked this last night and the contestant and I both said a dozen and 1, what on earth is a dozen and one? If you got this correct more power to you and your brain.

5.       What percentage of Zimbabweans has seen their mother naked? (www.gameshowsabout.com)

• None
• I agree with the above
• 95%

What?

 All of us have, and maybe the memory is so painful that some repressed it. Zimbabwean women go around naked in front of their kids until the children start asking awkward questions at dinner,

“Daddy why does mummy have feathers and I don’t?”

“Mummy, daddy has a really big belly button.”

6.       You make plans with friends and they cancel on you, what do you do? www.quizrocket.com

o   Ask them why

o   Make fun of them and then call up someone else

o   Say “whatever,” and plan a night that will be great so they don’t cancel again

ALL of the above, destroy go to town! Subject her to third degree, heck go 99⁰ on her toocus. Ask them why they are so selfish and insensitive and where they get off thinking you will go alone, like the good Lord never thought to bless you with friends.

STEP 2 Make fun of them, how they cannot keep a man, and have the worst morning breath

STEP 3 Really get into it now, use every weapon secret, fault and basically any dirt you have, the louder you yell the better.

“YOU ARE NOT MY FRIEND, YOU ARE AN INSENSITIVE (place really rude word here)! WHY I EVEN STUCK AROUND IS BEYOND (place very rude word here)!” 

Basically after this conversation you will feel like a jerk and won’t want to go out anymore, plus you’d have lost a friend. But hey who needs friends right?

7.       If your partner/girlfriend/boyfriend was a cartoon character which one would he/she be?

Chances are, whatever you pick is wrong!

 I liken my boyfriend to that bodiless man in the Power Rangers, The Morphing Grid.

8.       What two words in English used as one word spell the same word forwards backwards and

Forwards?

I gave up on this one I really did, if you think you have an idea let me know.

9.       Do you have AIDS?

Good question this, yesterday was World AIDS day, it’s appropriate for me to ask. Especially if you are in a Sexual Network. And if you don’t know if you are in one that just sucks.